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Emily Lucarz blog

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Releasing Vanity : Lyndsie’s Story, Part 2. St. Louis child photographer

Aug

02

Part 1:ย The Strength Beneath the Pink

Part 2:ย Releasing Vanity

Part 3:ย Beneath the Beautiful

Part 4:ย The Red Savior

Part 5:ย Story of her life

For updates, follow her story onย Facebook

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Releasing vanity. Sounds horrible doesn’t it? It’s really not. We are all vain. ย I really wish we weren’t, but it’s just how we are programmed. ย Maybe it’s not bad. There are certain parts of vanity that are good. Let’s explore that. ย When we want our appearance to be “good”, is that vain? I don’t think so. If we don’t care about our appearance, is that bad? Nope. Everyone has a right to care or not care about their appearance. ย So our personal definitions of vanity are all probably different. What we all probably agree on, is a person who is TRULY vain, wants to “show off” their excellence to others, for lack of a better definition :).

Lyndsie decided to cut her hair before she started loosing it. She asked during the process, “Emily, I hope others don’t see me as being vain for doing this”. Oh Lyndsie. ย You are not vain. Vanity gets misused. As a woman, when you loose part of your femininity, NOT by choice, you are ALLOWED to feel sad. You are not being vain, you are being human.

I must say Lyndise is PROUD of her beautiful hair. Being proud and vain are not the same things. When we are proud, it’s our opinion of ourselves. When we are vain, it’s what we perceive other’s opinions should be.

Lyndsie does not care about anyones opinions but her children’s. She knew her husband would love her regardless. ย She was more concerned her change in appearance would somehow affect her children. Guess what. They….DIDNT. EVEN. NOTICE.

We all know Lyndise is beautiful. So I hereby release her of any fears of her feeling like she’s being “vain”. ๐Ÿ™‚ She’s not. We all adore her. We all support her. Her family loves her. Her children and husband love her. End of story. Vanity is officially out the window. No time to worry about be vain while kicking cancer’s butt.

Now, just because she’s not being vain, does not mean she’s not sad. ย Lyndise is allowed to be sad. ย She has defined her “OUTER” looks with her AMAZING eyelashes and incredible head of hair. It’s part of her. ย So to loose her hair (the doctors are hopeful she will keep her eyelashes) in such a horrible way, is sad. When a woman goes for a haircut, because she wants a new style. Thats their choice. If Lyndsie wants to fight her cancer, she has ย NO CHOICE but to loose her hair. ย So the meaning behind cutting her hair is at an entirely different level.

Lyndsie told me, “Emily, I can’t handle being in the shower one day, washing my hair, and feeling a clump of hair fall out. I can’t do it. Im strong, but not THAT strong. So I want to cut it.”

Cut it she did. Not only did she cut it, she saved 6 of her 7 pony tails to donate to Locks of Love. She kept one to remember why she’s doing this. To get back to her strong bad self once she’s kicked this. ย She didn’t have to donate her hair. She could of made a wig for herself. She decided there was probably someone out there, namely a child, who would want hair more than she did. ย Love her. ย Honestly I do. I have been chosen for some reason to be in her life. Not sure why. But I am sure glad as all heck I have been. I’m a better person for knowing her and her family. Big giant hug. Ok moving on ๐Ÿ™‚

 

Now lets look at Lyndsies haircut day. Her good friend Elizabeth was there to cut her hair. Fitting she have a close friend to do the honor of her big hair donation day :). ย Cup half full, cup half full. We will not be looking at Lyndise loosing anything anymore, but doing something positive to help her maintain the strength to get through this.

So here we go. Let’s give Lyndsie a haircut, in her home, where she’s surrounded by only those that know and love her. Yep. I love her.

 

Lyndsie just before her haircut. You will notice I have just a FEW in color. Bw tell the story in a way color just can’t. Color is left for a few special moments.

 

Lyndsie Blythe

 

Ok! Let’s do this.

 

 

 

 

Even Lyndsie is allow to be scared. Or sad, or whatever she needs to be. This face is not laughter. Bless her heart. She puts on such a brave face for all of us. I was honestly relieved to see her show how she is really feeling. She’s so amazing. I just love this girl. You can tell, from the above photos, it was building. Mom and Elizabeth were trying to be fun and supportive with that FIRST ponytail cut off (Locks of Love needs 6 ponytails to make a wig). ย But it was time for Lyndsie to release and actually be afraid for a bit. Love her.

 

And so I set down my camera and went to give her a hug and a kiss on the head. Missed the shot I was aiming for. ย Cut off half of her face actually in the shot, but grabbed her eyes which said it all anyways. ย But I had more important things to give my attention to at that moment. I just wanted to hug her. But I knew it would just make things worse as Lyndise is trying SO hard to be SO strong. Cup half full. Cup half full. ย So after the quick hug and smooch, back I went to documenting this huge moment for Lyndise and her family. While the entire time, I was secretly holding it in. Release.

The below image is what I saw the entire time. Lyndsie. All the ones behind her rallying in her support. Which she needs. But it’s like she was in her own world. Praying to make it through for her kids. Knowing the entire time she was doing ALL of this for those standing around her. ย It’s really hard sometimes to see how someone really feels when they are SO good at making everyone else happy. Hiding their raw emotion. Also, what you DON’T see, is the emotion that her family is holding in themselves. They are strong. Lyndsie is brave. Lyndsie is real. Lyndsie is tough. Lyndsie is the strength beneath the pink.

In the collage below, you can see her speaking to her daughter. She said to her at that moment “this is all for you baby girl. I’m doing this all for you.”

ย Sometimes you just need your mom

 

 

She did it!

Her first look…

She’s so beautiful.

Get THIS! Her sister, Tracie, drove AFTER running the 1/2 marathon in Chicago, to join in on the haircutting experience. Amazing.

Family

In case you missed the start of Lyndsies story, you can visit it here: The Strength Beneath the Pink. ย Make sure to not only read her story but watch the video which is just at about the top of that post. It will really show you Lyndsie and the bond with her and her family

To follow Lyndsie, go become her friend on her new FB page just for you guys, Lyndsie.

Last but not least, sadly, cancer is very expensive. Her good friends have set up a page for her where you can help. Visit Care for Lyndsie for more details.

Stay tuned and continue to support Lyndsie though her journey.

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  1. Amanda says:

    I just want to say that this touched my heart. You are both beautiful women.

  2. Jess says:

    Tears hit when I saw the photo. You are so strong. Im praying for you. You have set the ultimate example for your young daughter. ((Hugs))

  3. Ragen Riff says:

    wow. i truly felt like i embarked on this leg of the journey with them. Emiily, kuddos to you on capturing it all. Thank goodness fate brought u two together. Thiss needs to be converted into a tell all book, with the way you both have with words, it would be easy peasy!!!! ๐Ÿ™‚

  4. Ragen Riff says:

    wow. i truly felt like i embarked on this leg of the journey with them. Emily, kuddos to you on capturing it all. Thank goodness fate brought u two together. This needs to be converted into a tell all book, with the way you both have with words, it would be easy peasy!!!! ๐Ÿ™‚

  5. Liz says:

    This is such a beautiful thing! The raw emotion is so beautiful. There are really no words to say, but I can pray!

  6. Goodness, those images are emotional. I think the one that got me was her expression after the first cut … I’m right on the edge of tears myself. You did a beautiful job documenting it, Emily; and Lyndsie, you are in my thoughts and prayers.

  7. Sherry Thoele says:

    This is beautiful… Lyns you look great. Tracie you look great. Cyndie you look great and very fulfilled. You have the most wonderful daughters. God has blessed you Cyn.

    Love you all. Humbly crying……. Aunt Sherry

  8. Praying for you honey. Emily made me cry again dang it! You are so beautiful, and I’m actually digging the short hair. HUGS and KISSES!

  9. Oh my goodness… you captured this beautifully!

    AND Lyndsie is rocking that pixie cut. She’s beautiful with or without her long locks of hair.

  10. Aimee says:

    Lyndsie is simply stunning no matter the length of her hair. Such a beautiful post. She will be in my prayers.

  11. Jen says:

    The photos are so amazing in this post. You can tell the emotion. Lyndsie, you are a gorgeous woman! I was amazed at how you looked afterward. You have a such a beautiful face that you can pull off any hair cut. <3

  12. Linda Jenkins says:

    Wow, you and your sister are both beautiful with long hair but I’ve got to tell you that both of you really rock those hair cuts.

  13. Tina Zimmer says:

    I did the same thing about five months ago, and when it started falling out I let my husband shave it! Now I have peach fuzz! You look great! You can do it!

  14. Dani says:

    Simply Beautiful. Even though we’ve never met, I can sense that you are incredibly strong. Your story has touched me beyond words and I will be praying for you every step of the way! You are gorgeous, and can pull off that pixie like a rockstar!

  15. Kerri says:

    This was absolutely touching and brought tears to my eyes. You can feel the emotion she is going through just looking at these photos.

    What a STRONG woman she is. By the way, the new hair cut is awesome! I really love it!

  16. Gretchen Vizza says:

    Lyndsie…I have not seen you since you were just a very young teenager…but all I can say is you have become a strong and beautiful young woman!!! You have amazed me and all of my girls with your strength, courage and grace!!! You have such a beautiful face, that you can rock any hairstyle…truly!! Keep up the fight, and know you have so many people praying for you:). Keep up the fight…and as my mom always told me…keep your chin up:)!! You represent all the real qualities of a truly beautiful woman!! Hugs to you everyday of the journey:)!!! Love, Gretchen Vizza. (Lisa’s mom);)

  17. Cyndie Thoele says:

    Thank you Emily. It was a hard day that I dreaded too. But as you can see our Lyndsie is STILL SMILING!! The friend that cut her hair Elizabeth or Beeb as we lovingly call her did a wonderful job on both girls. Both donated their hair to Locks for Love. Now about the smiling part. Thank you to everyone who is helping her to smile her way through this. There are days we just belly laugh. I’m serious. Her “Loopy Lyndsie” posts though sometimes unreadable are a must read that we read every Wed. after chemo. Emily you are such a kindhearted person. We truly appreciate you and are glad you are in this with us. Please everyone know that your continued prayer is working. So please keep them coming. xoxox Lyndsie’s mom

  18. Charlotte says:

    What a brave and wonderful thing you did cutting your hair early and thinking of others. Praying and will continue to pray that you win this fight in a big way! God bless you!!!

  19. she is beautiful and all that hair will come back, i am right there with her. Mine came back curly and so cute.

  20. Liz Francis says:

    This story is so touching! Emily, the photography shows so much emotion. I feel like we are all on this journey with her. Keep up the good work. Lyndsie, you look beautiful with the new do! Stay strong, prayers and well wishes are on the way!

  21. Jessica says:

    These images put a ball in my throat. These images are PERFECT. Seriously, truly perfect. And Lyndsie, I promise on my life I am not just saying this, you are still SO. FREAKING. GORGEOUS. I don’t think there is anything you can do to change that. Many prayers your way.

  22. Tiffany Parker says:

    What a beautiful strong woman! Thanks so much for sharing your story! This is what life is all about…keep going, keep fighting! Sending lots of prayers your way to you and your family!

  23. sandi says:

    Hi Lyndsie. I am overwhelmed with emotions for
    You. God Bless you and your precious family. You are not
    Alone. So many people are lifting you up in Prayers.
    I know how much you loved your hair but have to say I just love
    Your haircut. Very stylish and sassy. Keep your faith.
    God will provide!

  24. Karen White says:

    Lyndsie… you beautiful, wonderful girl! My heart aches for you and this journey you are taking… but I am so damn proud of you and know that you will kick cancer’s butt! Sending many thoughts, ((HUGS)) and prayers to you and your wonderful family. I think of you all so often… and your are always in my prayers. You GO, Girl! Love you!!! Karen

  25. Natalie says:

    She is rocking the short hair! LOVE it! Go Lyndsie!!

  26. Carolyn Kratowicz says:

    Lots of love to you!
    Smiling through my tears as you continue to amaze me.

  27. Taylor says:

    This brought me to tears! SUCH a beautiful woman and such gorgeous pictures. Wow! <3

  28. Katie says:

    Wow. Wow. Wow. What an amazing woman! Such a pretty woman! I’m amazed! I’m proud of you! ๐Ÿ™‚

  29. Katie Lewin Photography says:

    Amazing that you get to travel this journey with Lyndsie. Both of you were put into each others lives for a reason. Lyndsie, you are an inspiration to many people! Keep up the fight and Kick Cancers Butt!!! <3

  30. Rayma Dade says:

    You look beautiful, I remember when I had to have my husband shave my head during chemo for Leukemia… Your in my prayers – Be Strong.

    Rayma

  31. Debbie says:

    These pictures brought back memories of the day I sat with my sister Kay getting her long blonde hair cut off during her battle with breast cancer. I got the call, it’s time. I got in my car and drove to Arkansas, scared and mad as hell! Just like you Lyndsie she was so brave. At least we all acted like we were. We laughed and we cried and she looked beautiful just like you. And I cried today again with your pictures for you and Jared. My sister is a 3 year breast cancer survivor. And you will follow in her footsteps, one step at a time. She later laughed and said the best thing about losing all your hair is you don’t have to shave your legs or arm pits, it was great! Beauty comes from within, you are beautiful from the inside out! Her hair grew back thicker with a little body, just like she ordered. We love you!

  32. karyn Johnson says:

    I am all choked up as I remember the little girl that spent so much time at my house. You were always a beautiful soul. P
    eace to you and your beautiful family little one. Love you

  33. kayla says:

    She is beautifully strong. This story is so heart touching and I pray that she beats cancer and can one day look back on these pictures with happiness for being so strong. It was so nice of her sister to cut her hair as well to show that lyndsie is not in this alone.

  34. Kristi says:

    Her beautiful eyes just POP now with the short hair. Love it!

  35. jessie lacrue says:

    wow! This is absolutely beautiful woman amazing to be able to allow other people to be there through the journey. She a is strong woman and I could only wish to have as much strength as her if ever in her place.God bless you in your fight ,and bless your family .

  36. Virgie Abalos says:

    Thank you for letting me follow your journey , you are a beautiful and brave young woman …. I will keep you in my prayers ! And keep on fighting!

  37. Dorothy Self says:

    bravo! tastefully done, beautiful story of something we all fear, being viewed with disdain. I particularly noticed that her mom held her breath when the first section was cut. and then the triumph at the end! such a lovely person, it shows! from the inside out!

  38. LOVE this!! How amazing. She is gorgeous!

  39. Renee says:

    I sobbed when I read your story and watched your video. When I saw your story, I too had just been diagnosed with breast cancer. I have a 3 year old and 6 year old sons. I am having a double mysectomy in two weeks. I understand your fears and frustrations. But we are going to beat this thing for our sweet children! I wish this was a journey neither of us had to take. But God will see us through this part of lives. I will be praying for you and your family

  40. lorri says:

    This is amazing.. my heart is full.. this brings tears to my eyes and a lump in my throat. Best.. best wishes to you and your family… thank you for sharing your journey.

  41. Kate says:

    She was soooo pretty before the cut, and as I watched the pain develop in her eyes, I found myself a little short of breath too. Tears. And good lord, she certainly is gorgeous with the short cut!!!
    My heart goes out to her and her family. Beautiful documenting, Emily. We’ll be following and cheering her on!

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